Christmas draws nearer

Oy vey.

Oh, goodness, I was supposed to go to Tulsa today! Drat! I'll have to drop Wayne a really apologetic email. (Wayne works in the Archdiocese Office of Vocations, and is super awesome.)

Well, I made it to Mass. On time. Did the choir thing. Major yay. No, seriously, it was good. Then I went to Wally World and spent 2 hours buying stuff for Christmas. (I'm making most of my gifts this year.) Couldn't find purple or pink candles. :P I was really looking forward to making an Advent wreath too.

Busy week ahead- gonna see what's up with my paperwork at Connors, then an Altar Society thing tomorrow night (I'm making my mom's legendary squash casserole. Big yay on that one, my friends. It really is legendary stuff.)

I'm really looking forward to going home on Saturday! I'm gonna stay a few days, see as many of my homeys as possible, and gonna definitely cruise by St. John's while I'm at it. My brother Jason having a big open house type thing and I'm really looking forward to it.

BTW, Jason has decided to seriously moderate his drinking, which is hard for anyone who's quite used to the sauce. If he can't do it himself he will go back to AA, though. Please pray for him! He's a sweet guy, and really talented, and the planet really needs him.

Anyway, I'm gonna leave off on- oh, smeg! There's a humongous zit right on my chin! Sorry. Just caught a look in the mirror.

As I was saying, I'm gonna leave off with a list of things I'm happy about, since I've been wangsting a lot here lately. (Wangst= Whiny ANGST)

1. My car seems to be working just fine, for once.
2. I've got my Christmas shopping done.
3. Lots of good parties ahead.
4. The choir at St. Joe's. (Tom Starnes, the director, is endlessly amusing.)
5. Fr. Bryan made a really funny comment re: Days of Obligation. "There is no two-for-one special this year. (We have to go on Christmas Eve b/c it's Sunday, then on Christmas b/c it's a holy day of obligation.) Hey, I'm in sales, not in management." LOL. You go, Fr. Bryan.
6. I gave myself a haircut, and it looks ok.
7. I just made a mushroom/spinach/tomato/mozzarella omlet, and it was FABULOUS.
8. I'm going home soon!
9. I'm gonna help decorate St. Joe's for Christmas.
10. That Monkees episode where Mike Nesmith played the Princess is one of the funniest things I've ever seen in my life. (Seriously, as far as drag goes, Nesmith gives the guys from Python a run for their money. Hysterically funny.)



Right now I am struggling with my fears of inadequacy, and failure. I sometimes wonder why I even became Catholic- not because I don't love Catholicism, but because I don't feel like a very good example of Catholicism.

It's not that I don't believe in God. I do, truly and sincerely with all my heart. I just feel that although he may love me, he probably doesn't like me very much.